a different point of view

"The more you try to control something, the more it controls you. Free yourself. Let things take their own natural course."

 

A friend sent that to me a few days ago and it really hit home. 

Life seems to have a crazy way of working itself out. New jobs, new friendships, new weight (oops), new goals, new plan, same friends, same town, same basic routines. Basically the same life with a different point of view. That makes me happy.

I've spent a lot of time over the last few years trying to figure out my happiness. Not necessarily my happiness with others, but happiness with myself. I feel like I've always been somewhat of an independent person. I take care of myself. I'm okay with making my own decisions. I'm proud of the decisions I make for myself. Do I always make the best decisions? ehhhhh. not so much. Are there things I wish I could have a do-over for? absolutely. I'm learning. I'm a work in progress. I'm working on letting things go.

This is an extremely random post. I realize that. 

For the first time in a while I feel at peace with myself. I'm happy with my decisions and I feel like I'm working on the whole "free yourself" thing.

Baby steps.

Sooo....last Thursday I made up my mind about some things. Some changes I want to make. Some things I want to stop running from. The things I want in my life. I made a list of all of the things I want and made a promise to myself that I will go after what I want. I didn't go to work Friday. I got in the car and drove. I drove to the thing that makes me the happiest. The thing that makes me feel comfortable in my own skin. The thing that makes everything okay.  The thing that makes me feel like me. No filter. No hiding. It was the most fun, easy going, genuinely happy weekend I have had in a really long time. I needed the weekend. I needed it to remember.

I usually have a million pictures of every random thing I do. This weekend was different. I made it home with two. Sunday morning. two people. 6 biscuits. 4 pieces of bacon. 2 poached eggs. scrambled eggs. a piece of ham. hash browns. pancakes. and some other kind of sausage.

And this. My college bff, that lives in Houston, was 10 minutes down the highway from me in Dallas visiting her man so we couldn't pass up an opportunity to squeeze in an hour of reminiscing and laughing about the old days.  

 

I'm so thankful for this weekend.

I'm thankful for feeling alive again.

 I'm thankful for my family that loves me unconditionally.

I'm thankful for my friends that support my ridiculousness.

I'm thankful for the people who don't give up on me.

Im thankful for this life. 

I'm thankful for this point of view.